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With the intensity of the sun

November 18, 2009
It’s time I face it. I have been hurt badly.  Sometimes Anthony will do somthing that reminds me of it.. I know I never really have been bothered by it. I don’t know why its bothering me so bad right now. I don’t want to fall asleep on the phone with Anthony cause I’m so scared I’m going to talk about it in sleep. I don’t want to be at that level again. Never. I will never allow it. I can’t. I just can’t. I’ve had a year to accept this. I guess its really time to. I still wish I could have kept it to myself. I have all these people who come to me for help. I don’t feel like I can go to anyone for help. I don’t want to burden them, I dont want to hurt them. Maybe its time I let someone in. Everytime I pass that house I get this big lump in my stomach that rises to my throat. All the good times in that place seem to disolve into thin air. Then all those bad times shine with the intensity of the sun.
Posted by cryingtemptress at 6:45 pm | permalink | Add comment

Pain

January 16, 2008

You seem to cry like the rain in the sky..
I’m down at your feet, listening to your beat..
~~
Passing the time..
You’re shouting inside, while you seem to hide.
Your dreams are forgotten,
hidden inside the forgotten love of time.
Your not fine.
Forever chained with the tears and the downs,
when the nights close in and the darkness surrounds,
you feel your bones fade and shatter,
“I am dead,
dead as can be,
if you could only see,
just what this is doing to me..“
Tears dripping down your face,
So much sadness in a lost girl’s face,
Crawling closer to the opened door,
“No ones there, does anyone care?“
Will this lost girl ever be found?
All she asks is for you to look,
Search deeper,
Find the soul,
The soul locked in,
Find the key to unravel me..
How many reasons does she have to give?
When the new day is dawning to light,
Her everyday starts with a fight.
Seems like her world is falling apart,
You see no tear in her eye,
No sign of pain,
Therefore she must not be in pain.
Yet, she cries herself to sleep every night,
Wakes up from haunting nightmares,
If you look, her eyes reflect pain and fears,
She screams so loud,
How come no one hears?
She kicks and throws objects,
How come no one sees?
She holds herself in the water,
Praying she could find the courage to not come up.
“I feel like I am locked away in a box of pain,
Drowning in an endless pool of rain,
That won’t stop falling from my tired eyes.“

Posted by cryingtemptress at 3:15 am | permalink | Add comment